Friday, April 1, 2011

I love bottle-feeding

bottle

It feels that there is a huge anti-bottle/pro-breast movement these days... and I get it.

I just don't think that breastfeeding is for everyone.

There may be physical reasons with either the mom or babe that doesn't allow it. There may be emotional reasons it doesn't work out. Some women just plain don't like to breastfeed and where is the mother/ child bonding then?

Besides, shouldn't it be a pro-breastmilk/ anti-formula movement?

I personally ended up pumping a lot more than I breastfed. I just couldn't handle the schedule of doing both all the time. In the beginning I was breastfeeding, then bottle-feeding and then pumping at each feeding time. That left me with approximately 30 seconds to rest before the next feeding.

I eventually ended up just pumping and then feeding him a bottle whenever I could produce enough to fill up a whole bottle. I've just found that when asked or asking if women are breastfeeding there seems to be a great amount of guilt linked to admitting they aren't.

Do I think that Peanut will become an axe murderer because he missed out on a lot of very special mommy breastfeeding and bonding? Eh, not likely.

I feel like we still spent a lot of time bonding regardless of whether or not it was with him on my breast.

I'm also pretty sure that if he grows up to have mommy issues that it will have to do with a myriad of other traumatic experiences I'll put him through and not for lack of breastfeeding.

I think.

Formula is not poison...it's formula.

bottle3

I love bottle-feeding. I still love holding him and looking into his eyes as he slurps away.

I love that daddy and grandma and grandpa get to sit quietly and feed him as well.

Perhaps it's the way Peanut was introduced to the bottle (the poor child was starving) that caused him to take to it so wonderfully. He was less than a week old and I believe that the result was a child that floated easily between the bottle and the breast.

That kid will eat anything. He must have gotten that from his father. He switches easily back and forth between formula and breastmilk.

I will never understand this because formula is completely disgusting where as breastmilk is quite sweet.

Yes, I tasted my breastmilk...didn't you? Anyone?

Peanut has used 4 different kinds of bottles and could care less what it is as long as you feed him. We were lucky enough not to have any nipple confusion. He's a pretty easy baby.

bottle1

Let's not overlook the obvious. Bottle-feeding = Freedom!

It means being able to sleep through the next feeding. It means more mommy time, showering for longer than 5 minutes and an extra moment to cling to any remaining sanity in those critical times.

That first day he took a bottle I was too relieved that he was no longer starving to be upset that my original plan was already unhinged. Besides, it allowed me the next hour or so to have a near nervous breakdown over going to the bathroom for the first time post-birth (or shall we say post-stitches). You know, "the bathroom". The experience was too traumatic to speak any more of but I sure am glad I didn't have to worry about feeding the baby during the trauma.

I'm pretty sure that if I have another babe I'll think hard on using a bottle occasionally from the get go with that one also. I don't think there is anything wrong with using a bottle occasionally or exclusively.

I do believe that breastmilk is the best start you can give your baby.

I understand and enjoyed the process of breastfeeding but I also love our bottle-feeding situation.

I've learned that "the norm" just doesn't exist when it comes to parenting. The norm changes with each person you speak to.

There are always arguments for and against every parenting decision to be made.

In the end you just have to do not only what you think is right but also what feels right for you.

9 comments:

  1. Mwah, you're lovely and speak with such wisdom. I'm pretty much at ease with having bottle fed our kids - until someone looks stunned, as though I've admitted to poisoning them!

    With Mikey, and adoption there was no question! With Dan I planned to breastfeed and did for a while but dealing with the difficulty of having my first baby whilst looking after my eldest son who had additional needs became impossible - partly for my sanity. With Jemima, I fed her myself for a short while and then felt the familiar panicked anxiety creeping up on me. Bottle feeding for me was the difference between PND and being a happy mummy. I opt for happy every time!

    Lots of love to you and your gorgeous family! Xxx

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  2. Oh ,,,what a precious baby!!! luvuallbye

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  3. I'm so glad you posted this! I'm due in a little over a month and am one of those rare people who plan to pump exclusively from the get go. I want the baby to have breastmilk, but I don't want them on my boob. For whatever reason I'm just very uncomfortable with the idea. And the way I see it, if I'm not comfortable chances are baby won't be either...and then we're both unhappy. Women have so many decisions to make regarding pregnancy, birth and child-rearing, but sadly are often criticized for actually (gasp) choosing something other than the status quo. We should be supporting each other! Kudos to you for doing what's best for your family and not being afraid to say so!

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  4. I find it interesting that during the first year of life soooo many people provide opinions to new moms on what they should be doing. I now have a 9 year old daughter, 7 year old son and 4 year old daughter and now that I am looking for opinions or advice on what to do in certain situations.... I am left with very few options. Hmmmm very interesting to me. Dawn, my only advice to every mom is do what works for you and your family and all will be o.k. I breastfed each one of my kids but each one was different. One breastfed for 14 weeks, one for 8 and one for 18. None of it was based on them or medical I could have probably kept producing enough milk for an entire year, but during each one things were different and so I made the best choice for my family at that time. I think that is all we can do.

    PS Great job on writing this so many new moms will appreciate it. :)

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  5. Very good post.

    Even 25 years ago there was such a bias against bottle feeding. Ridiculous and often intrusive. My thought was always that it wasn't anyone's business but HHBL and mine how we handled it. I breast fed cuz......I was just plain lazy to be honest. I could have had all the formula I wanted through my Dad (OB/GYN doc) but I was just lazy. But it wouldn't have killed the progeny if they had been bottle fed. And it might have been a whole bunch easier if I could have handed one of them, along with a bottle, to some other unsuspecting adult and then hightailed it out of the room.

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  6. Thank you for writing this! It seems everywhere I turn, I am looked down upon for bottle-feeding my baby. I tried to breastfeed, but my milk never came in (not that I feel that I have to defend my decision). The formula of today is the closest to breastmilk that it's ever been. My son has never been sick and I only feel guilty about giving him a bottle when the breastfeeding moms make it seem like that is the ONLY option and that my son will always be sicker and dumber than the children that were breastfed.

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  7. Girl, you just can't go wrong when you're doing what works for YOU. Amen. The end.

    :)

    Happy baby= Happy Mama.
    Happy Mama= Happy EVERYONE.

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  8. AMEN!! And amen. Amen again. I liked bottle feeding too. I liked seeing my twins faces. I liked seeing Jeff feed them too. I thought bottles were a god-send. :o)

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  9. It's funny how things turn around. I'm 54 and I did breastfeed my daughter. At that time the convenience and freedom of the bottle was the big deal and I was looked at like I was some kind of hippie idiot or trying to drag women back to the stone age by doing something that seemed completely natural to me. My mother was completely appalled that I would offer my ahem, BREAST to my child. How indiscreet. Those days feminism was blooming and anything that freed women to work was best for all concerned. So I was going very much against a tide that has now turned and treat women who bottle feed as unnatural. Strange, isn't it?

    The bottom line is that each woman should make the choice that works best for them. I am constantly amazed at the warfare that goes on among mothers who KNOW BEST FOR EVERYONE. Ignore them and just enjoy your child. It is the hardest job in the world to raise kids so don't take on a load of guilt when you're already carrying a heavy responsibility as it is. Peanut looks loved, healthy and happy so clearly you are doing something right.

    Jaxx

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